Thursday April 5, 2007
I accompanied Beth to her ultrasound appointment yesterday. Last week, seeing Dr. T and hearing his verdict / prognosis gave us such encouragement. While the measurements he got weren’t vastly different from Dr. Thompson’s, it was good to hear of other similar cases. He told us then that TTT-S can stay the same, progress to surgery level, or even, in rare cases, reverse itself. Beth’s babies were at an “alert watch” state.
I think I’ll simply copy and paste Beth’s version of the story here.
Monday evening, I realized with a start that I had not definitely felt Hannah since Saturday evening. I called the doctor on call, which out of five, was Dr. Thompson! He said they would do no procedures yet that night so to come in Tuesday morning. I got there as soon as I could manage getting out of bed (still takes a while) for an ultrasound. He again was concerned for Hannah’s heart. Her blood sometimes stops flowing between beats. He worked me in to see the specialist today, Wednesday. I am twenty-one weeks today.
This time, Dr. T. also found Sarah’s pocket of fluid to be 11 cm. Hannah’s pocket is still 2.3, though, so that keeps us out of the surgery category. He also found Hannah’s troublesome dopplers (heart patterns). (That means Dr. Thompson was more accurate all along; I’ll be sure to compliment him.=) )
Last night, Dr. T. talked to one of (four?) surgeons in the US about when to send patients for surgery. [Insert: that makes us feel well taken care of.] The surgeon says they won’t do surgery as long as the smaller baby has a pocket of at least 2 cm. He further explained it could actually not be TTT-S, but growth retardation in the smaller baby. The babies would then actually not be sharing blood vessels, but the smaller baby just wouldn’t have enough blood vessels. This condition is untreatable. The smaller baby would be abnormal or then would not survive. He didn’t say he thinks that is the problem, but he was explaining why he’s not sending us for surgery if he sees heart problems. (BTW, we’d go to Detroit instead of Tampa; he says they’re more personable.)
Why is it hard to accept maybe having one or two handicapped children? Is it pride? Does it look inconvenient and expensive? It is hard for me to see things not come to their full potential, but I could learn to see “full potential” in a different way. Is God wanting to expand my compassion and lessen my perfectionism? It is hard to think of identical twins being so not identical! Another thing that makes it look overwhelming, is to not only have three babies, but to have special needs in addition. How will I spread that thin???
Your prayers help. I feel at peace and supported when I go in for ultrasounds.
Love, Beth and Kelvin
When we walked out of the office, I looked at Beth and said, “Now we just keep hoping it’s TTT-S” and then we both sort of looked shocked. One week ago, no one could have told either of us we would think anything could be less hopeful than to hear the babies have TTT’S (except of course to hear that they had already died).
Throughout this journey, I continue to be amazed with Beth’s faith and stability. I keep saying, “she’s an amazing little woman.” And yes, Jo, I will try to post a picture of Kelvin and Beth soon. What a great idea.
As for what is going on with our little family, life continues. Wake up. Work. Sleep. Wake up. Work. Sleep. We are seriously in the “just keep functioning” mode right now and sometimes I’m not sure we’re even doing that very well. The good news is that we ARE winding down to the finish (or else I don’t think either David Lee or I would be functional anymore). The EXCELLENT news is that Steve and Christy are coming! I looked around the other day when I was caulking and realized that I have been prepping and painting since January. At that rate, it would likely be June before I finish. We despaired and decided to hire a painter to help us out 3 days or so. Steve and Christy got wind of it and offered to undercut his price! So now we get help for an entire week and, knowing Steve, I suspect we’ll be very nearly finished with the entire project by the end of the week. I can hardly wait. With all due respect to Steve and his work and support, what I am really most excited about is having Christy here. For one week, I will not have to drum up babysitters or feel guilty for dropping Adam off hither and yon for the better part of the week. I can go out to the house early in the morning and she will be here to take care of Adam when he wakes up. The laundry will get done instead of piling up until I can be home for a few hours. We will eat food instead of grabbing a bite in the same three drivethroughs again. And best of all, I have someone here to help me obsess over every little detail from cabinet hardware, to the right color for our master bedroom (which is very wrong right now). I can’t wait to cuddle Zachary and listen to him giggle. Now if we could just figure out a way to get David Lee’s part of things sped up, maybe we COULD move by the first of May.
Wow. And the hardest part can be waiting and not knowing…I can only imagine what Beth and the rest of you are feeling.
What would we do without sisters? So glad you’ll have that wonderful “sisterly” help. =)
have fun with christy next week! hope you get lots done!
how is it going? hope you are getting way more done than you would have even dreamed of! blessings…Katy