Thursday February 17, 2011
:: surgery on Monday went well
:: physically I feel stronger every day
:: emotionally I hit the wall -again- yesterday
I thought I’d gone as low as it gets on Friday two weeks ago. But now, I’m there again. My coping skills are exhausted. Right now I feel like a walking, breathing version of death and emptiness. It is unbelievable the way the death of a big dream simultaneously leaves you bereft of all interest in pursuing any smaller ones.
I’ll be back sometime when I feel better.
thinking of you and praying for you in this dark time. my your soul and heart be held tightly in his hands…
hugs.
don’t be too hard on yourself. give yourself time. what you’ve been through is huge!
one day at a time, girl. nice and slow.
“weeping may endure the night….” and sometimes our nights last for weeks!
but “joy comes in the morning.” the dawn is coming, friend. the joy. it really is.
much love~
thanks for the update….now i know more how to pray for you sweet friend…
hang in there…bask in the Sonshine of perfect peace, and the sunshine of brighter days soon to come.
Oh, Michelle. So sorry for you and what you are going through. I liked what Amber wrote ^^^.
It is a very hard thing you are dealing with and I think it is ok to give yourself permission to grieve.
michelle. i’m sorry girl.
coping skills can become exhausted when they really prove to be adequate for our beings. emotionally. physically and spiritually. amber already said it, don’t be too hard on yourself. know. count on. rest in. the fact that your friends and sisters will carry you to Jesus…love ya lots.
oh, michelle, i feel for you! How I remember those days! Like Amber said, the night can last for a long time… and you’ve been through a lot. :'( Give yourself as much time as YOU need… grieve and hurt as much and as long as you need. It’s a process that can’t be rushed. Some days you’ll think it’s all pretty much behind you, and then suddenly it catches you off-guard, and you realize that it takes a long time. And don’t forget that hormones can and will be affecting you. love, prayers, and a great big ((((((((((HUG)))))))))))
Michelle…my heart is hurting for you. Your pain comes through in your words. I am praying…
I am so… sorry!
{{Hugs}}
Healing takes time, but you will feel better. Promise. =)
Praying for you.
I’ve been thinking of you and praying……hope you can have some sunshine in your life soon…..some little warm rays of hope. Love you, dear. I’m so Sorry for the pain you are dealing with.
I’m sad you’re sad! Don’t be too hard on yourself. Grief comes in many different ways; hold tight to the Father! Praying for you.
Oh Michelle… so very sorry. I hope you have lots of people that are helping to take care of your boys and that are also taking good care of *you* right now… ♥
Oh, Michelle… I’m so very sorry and my prayers are with you…
I’m sorry Michelle. pls. give yourself a hug for me.
you’re not only mourning this baby, you’re mourning the loss of your dream of a baby sometime soon. that’s alot of loss. I like what Audrey wrote, she has been there and understands your pain prly alot better then most of us do.
Hang in there!
I’m so sorry you have to go through all of this. May God give you strength and hold you in the palm of his hand, where there is warmth and comfort. Loosing a child no matter what way is HARD. Heaven just becomes all the more real.
HUGS to you.
Hi Michelle,
It’s me from the “Ladies Seminar” at Hartwell. I know too how you feel. I had a miscarriage before I had Doreen (My 28wk premee with heart defect). It’s no fun going through grief. Don’t try to rush yourself. Grief cannot be rushed, you have to let it take its time….it might be a long time. And as its been mentioned you might think you are over the worst and you start all over again. Praying for you!!!! ♥Barb
My heart felt heavy reading this, Michelle.
I wish I could step in and fix it all for you, but I can’t and we both know that. What I can do is pray for the Prince of Peace to come sit with you today….filling you with a sense of His wholeness.
You sweet child of God you need to grieve like the others said give yourself time! It is ok… Even Jesus grieved for his friends who died. I been in your shoes and I feel your pain. God is by your side right now. Give it all to Him and rest. Prayerfully Debbi
Oh honey . . . been there, done that . . . too many times . . .
Be patient . . . give yourself lots of time and space . . . emotions and hormones are changing rapidly . . . for myself, I found I had this huge drive to suddenly do all kinds of crazy stuff . . . it made no sense to me until I read some where that you have all kinds of emotional energy that was going into the creative process of growing a baby, and suddenly that has been short-circuited through death. And it has to find an outlet somewhere. Ahh. Then I understood my crazy drive to repaint and re-do the living room on a shoe-string budget. And to do other things . . .
I had to be patient with myself the time I found my self sobbing in Wal-mart . . . or the Christian book store . . . and to be patient with the fact that I couldn’t bear to be separated from my hubby . . .
I wish I could wipe your tears and sadness away . . . but I can’t . . . but I will pray for you to find the solid Rock down under-neath the mud and slop and turmoil of your emotions and physical changes. And for you to know that HE is there with you no matter how bad the day is . . .
Tears . . . Hugs . . .
Praying!
My heart is hurting for you, but I continue praying. Lean on the Father. He will sustain you.